Tuesday, January 5, 2010

something new.

i was shocked by the news i heard and wasn't really on my senses while taking a jeep going home. i was like betrayed by someone i trusted. again, trust is very common to me. i didn't care about the heat of the sun that made me perspire underneath. i just want to go home.

kanina, i was starving, after the walang kamatayang take out chicken meal from Jollibee on my first break, i was thinking of eating again.. then finding some time to realize that I need to lose weight, but then again, I was on the start line of depression, I wasn't feeling any hunger at all.

I rode a tricycle thinking about the endless years of working with different companies around, spending months, years and my life with people addicted to taking calls and making sure that numbers are achieved. It stopped when someone said, "Para po sa tabi." Bumaba na rin ako.

I went inside Ministop and headed towards one direction. I need to drink. I grabbed a bottle of Red Horse, still thinking how many bottles should I get. I can drink 5 bottles of 500ml amber colored-bottled drink yet, wala akong yelo sa bahay, so I just grabbed one and bought a pack of cigarettes. NO LUNCH.

I went inside my crib. It's the same old dirty place with my jackets and laptop bags on my blue couch, dirty laundry on the table and my resting haven. I opened my laptop as I lit one cigarette and puffed until I lit another cigs til I got 3 sticks at a time. I opened my favorite drink.

Then I saw honey went online. I couldn't talk anything about what had happened but then again I realized, whatever happens, she will be at my side all the time. Then my undeniably teary eyes just dropped. It contained depression, anger and emotions I couldn't control.

She was just there -- listening to my drama and didn't blame me at all. Then we realized we need to laugh. She made me smile. :)

I rallied by finishing off my beer and realized I got tired of crying, my chinky eyes went big this time.

And just when I thought that depression can kill me, honey gave me a better remedy that for the first time, we did it together. How? I don't really know. I will not give details of the kinky days (recorded: JANUARY 4-5, 2010) and like with other people say, start the new year with a bang! ;) o yeah baby, with a bang ;)).

It was a nice remedy than any medicine can give. I think Med will just make my day all the time :)

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